Thursday, March 26, 2009


Things have been up and down of late. On Wednesday I met up with the guy I met at the JCC purim party and who I subsequently went to Splash with. I'll call him hot jew - HJ. Anyway, in case you didn't get it yet, he's totally HOT. Now that i've got that out of the way, we decided we'd go out for dinner. He picked a place in midtown and I met him there. It was a really nice meal. I was a bit concerned about people hearing me talk about gay stuff, so I probably didn't talk as much as I wanted to. Of course not that I needed to be concerned, but that's just me. He's in his 30s, so has kind of gone through much of what I've going through, coming from a religious background and all. He's probably one of the few gay people that i've met from a similar background thats that age. Not that he's old, but most of the other people I've met are alot closer to my age and many are just finding their feet.

After we finished it was still early, too early to go out, so we went to visit a friend of his who had recently come out of hospital. I guess that was my one good deed for the month :) . After that it was time to say goodbye, we got on the subway and he got off at his stop. I was thinking of going home, but then i realized where I was - the UWS, should I give Mr Z a call? I got off a couple stops early because it was so warm out. I called him, left a voicemail and sent a text. Eventually I heard from him so I headed over and spent the night. I won't give you all the details, but I will say this 'reunion sex' was the best yet :)

The following night I had a 'date' with a girl, which was a disaster, and I followed that up with another visit to Mr Z.

The week overall has been interesting. I learnt a few things about my life, and gays in general. For one, my life isn't that interesting, except to a few people that see me in a bar and wonder if i'm lost. Jewish gays especially have often gone through or are going through very similar things. Another thing I learnt is how fickle gays really are. Or maybe i knew it but didn't want to accept it. I've found I'm starting to actively stop myself getting close to people, just in case they disappear from my life. I had a few good gay friends, the early ones, who I thought we'd be good friends forever. Slowly but surely contact reduces to a trickle, or they just drop off the face of the earth, and I wonder what I saw in them in the first place :( .



Anonymous said...

mmmm sunshine, havnt gotten that email that spams around about the people in your life:
-for a season
-for a reason
and for a lifetime...

Malric said...

It's not the "gays" that are fickle, it's youth. There are those who are mature enough to develop and maintain friendships and those who are not. Don't despair, it probably is the way you meet them. I have friends from college that I still keep in touch with, even after 24 years. Sigh, yeah, that long ago.

Keep a stout heart, you will find your friends when they (and you) are ready.

Jay said...

They're not young guys. Maybe gay 30s is equivalent to straights in their 20s. Either way shit happens