Sunday, October 26, 2008

Friends and facebook... or facebook and friends

So i've been chatting with a guy i met on craigslist. He was looking for friends, so was I. Sounds perfect. So i told him a bit about me, he told me a bit about himself. I tell him where i'm from. His ex is from the same place that i am. I'm intrigued. Maybe I know his ex. In fact i probably do. Do i know he is gay? Do i even ask? With a few vague details i think i'll take a stab at it. Is the first letter of the first name X? Is the first letter of his last name X? "How do u know?" I know everyone lol. We chat a bit more. It seems he has visited my hometown before, and met up with some other nice gay jewish boys. In fact he thinks i'm one of them, playing a trick on him. "Is this XXXXXX? YYYYYY?" No but now i'm shocked. he knows more gay jewish boys in my hometown than I do! I know a couple guys named XXXXXX. Is it one of them? It probably is. If he gives me the age i could prob tell who it is. But he's not giving me anything. He's given too much already. And the sad thing is it'd be great to have someone to chat to, someone i know, that happens to be gay too. But I know he's not going to tell me any more. I don't even bother asking. So what do i do? I can't exactly ask them straight up if they're gay. Do i get him to pass a message along like we're in second grade? I guess i'll have to chat some more with him then.

A similar topic is facebook. I have come out to a few guys who I was friendly with on my fake profile, and have since added them to my real profile as friends. I thought of telling another guy who I was and i searched for him and found that we have friends in common. He's friends with a cousin of mine. So where do we go from here? Is he out? If he's out, then my cousin may know and then the question might be asked how do i know him. If he's not out, what if he comes out, again how do i know him? Do i meet random people in the street that happen to be gay and add them on facebook? lol. Maybe having gay friends on my real profile isn't such a smart idea while i'm in the closet. I also had someone remove me as a friend because he was concerned about the same thing, so i'm not the only one who is paranoid, lol.

jay

2 comments:

David said...

This is what I mean by energy applied to concealing yourself, that could have been used to just enjoy your life.

Think about it.

Jay said...

gotcha!