Tuesday, April 1, 2008

Am i being too 'needy'?

I never thought of myself as needy. I've always been the easygoing, shy guy, doesn't cause any ripples, takes everything dished out to him on the chin. But maybe i'm changing...

My hot guy friend (from now on to be known as HGF) and i used to have alot of contact. Not physical contact, but we used to chat alot online, email each other back and forth. And I mean alot! We live in different continents and in different timezones and it was rare that either of us wokeup in the morning not to find a bunch of emails had been sent throughout the night and were awaiting a response.

Nowadays things are completely different. It feels like we're on a slowdown. I know he's pretty stressed out right now, with work and other commitments (like his partner) but i guess rightly or wrongly i'm just feeling a little left out. These days i usually just shoot off an obligatory email saying good morning, if anything at all. Maybe i got too emotionally attached to him from the outset? I mean he's taken, so its not as if we're in a relationship, but i feel that he's the best thing ever to happen to me and i miss him. I know there's so much more to it than that but still...

Anyway whenever he comes around he knows i'll be waiting and ready for it. Even if it takes a long time. So what do all you reader(s) out there think?

In other news, i need more sleep. So i'm going cut down on my all you can watch buffet of gay porn (thanks gay-torrents.net) and try to cut back on blog reading (but not too much). It's either that or sleep in every morning, which just isn't gonna work.I need to get into a proper routine, going to bed at reasonable hours, and waking up refreshed rather than exhausted. I wonder how long it'll last.

J

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