Where do i begin?!?

Let me start with my trip back to NY. More importantly the guy sitting in 24G. I didn't see him at first as I feel asleep before takeoff. But a couple hours later I was awake again and saw him. The first thing I noticed were those piercing blue eyes. They were incredible. I wasn't sure if he was gay, but he looked cute. German, dirty blond hair. Then I noticed the earring in his left ear. Wasn't sure if that meant he was gay, but he was reading a copy of Vanity Fair. And when he got up to get something out of his carryon and he stretched his shirt rode up and i could see the top of his CKs. The white ones with the red waistband, just like a pair i had :). I didn't take my eyes off him the entire flight. Nor at immigration, or baggage claim. Of course i didn't manage to attract his attention. I need to learn how to do that without actually going up to him and saying hi. Too bad I was sitting 2 rows back, on the outbound flight I had been sitting in his row.

Ok now onto someone else. I have a friend. Well a fb friend anyway. We've been chatting for a while, he knows who I really am. I think he is who i think he is. Meaning he has a few pics up on fb, but no facepic. He says that's really him, and i trust him. Recently he told me he didn't like the new me. My facebook statuses were often about sex, hooking up with guys, being horny and the like. I told him i'd tone it down, cos i didn't want to lose him as a friend. Of course then i got chatting with someone else. And i brought up the topic. He basically told me, why should you change who you are because someone else doesn't like it? The truth is they were both sort of right. Being all brash and crass wasn't who i really was, yet sometimes I liked it. Just being able to let it all out. So i contacted the first guy and told him. Thats who i am sometimes. If you don't like it, you don't have to remain my friend. That was probably a bit rude but hey, it is what it is.

And onto the guy i believe i refer to as Mr Z. What can I say about him... We had been in contact while i was overseas, i was dying to meet him again. We made plans to meet up again when I got back so i was really excited. I did send him a message though, being that i'm new to all this, asking what exactly is protocol. Do i just rock up to his place, or do we meet at a bar for a drink or what. His reply was either, whatever I wanted, or we could go on a proper date. Movie? Museum? That threw me a bit. This probably deserves it's own post, but what does that mean? Did he just ask me out on a date? He replied something to the extent of 'he'd like to be able to chat with me when i'm sober too'. My mind went into overdrive a bit. Was he interested in hanging out? Was he interested in a relationship? Was I interested in a relationship? At least right now? Damn these things get complicated. Plus there was an age difference (not that i care to be honest) and of course there was something i had been told by a reader of this blog in one of our chats. "Can you really see yourself settling down with a non jewish guy? How comfortable will you be with a christmas tree in your house?" The fact is if I were straight, I wouldn't consider marrying out of the faith, but i'm not. Settling down with a guy is already considered doing something wrong. So why should i give a fuck if the guy isn't jewish. I don't think i care that much. If i like the guy so be it.

I think i'm getting way ahead of myself here, it's just sex for now. And maybe hanging out a bit. But lets see where it goes. And i hope he doesn't read this blog post and flee for the hills.

Jay